Melee is the best bet.

HPCKJ7-N2Y9-CMWVKW-EVFV-B8H2E4

FWCX29-8YKK-JXHHE9-8CH9-E82TZ4

PCP88R-7YK6-4YGHT6-KGET-EE4EPE

MCH7CB-EEMF-XRWCX4-PG4R-4PWP84

Update 09/14/2010: Here’s another code, and if you’re wondering what it’s for, the date is a big hint.

VB9W8-4MMC6-XPMVD-DW2T6-3MKV3

I get what they’re trying to say – the PC is boxy and old-fashioned while the Mac is shiny and new. The unintentional humour is that while the Portal turret does it’s job adequately in its game, it’s easily defeated. The PC (or Team Fortress 2 turret) on the other hand starts out small and meek, but can be easily upgraded in to a massive powerhouse. That said, which would you rather have? Effective but locked down, or less-than-pretty but easily customizable?

Of course, I could just be reading too much in to things again.

Progress!

Not horribly news worthy, however I finally got all the damn gold medals on the original Track Mania Nations. Next up, the Forever update (the last five tracks are a pain in the ass!).

Before you send your device in for repair, please take a few pictures of it with a digital camera, if possible. This way, if the courier accidentally damages the device while in transit, you can easily prove the device was fine when you shipped it. Also, make sure the serial number is visible in at least one picture.

And I wasn’t joking. I can’t go in to specifics due to the contract I signed, however having pictures taken just before shipping greatly increased the chance of a customer getting a replacement device in the event of a disagreement.

As such, it makes sense to follow the same advice when dealing with another segment of Microsoft’s Entertainment division. Take pictures, and high quality ones, before sending in your device! Have them ready, because if you get a call saying your device was received damaged and won’t be repaired, immediately ask to speak to a Tier 2 agent and state that you have pictures proving you didn’t damage the device.

Make sure to remove the Hard Drive and any customer decals/face plates, too. You won’t be getting the same console back, and they won’t return anything you put in the box. This goes for cables, too.

Also important is how to pack the device. Don’t skimp on packing material. Go to a UPS Store, Staples, where ever, and get an appropriately sized box and some bubble wrap. Securely wrap the console in the bubble wrap, and then place it in the box. If you have any, place foam packing material in the larger voids in the box to prevent it from sliding around during shipping. This will decrease the chances of the console being damaged during shipping.

Finally, make sure to keep a copy of the tracking number. This will let you follow the devices progress as it makes its way to the repair depot.

If you’ve read this far, look after the break for pictures of my console, ready for shipping.

These images have been cropped and re-sized, and I’ve blurred the serial number and other unique identifiers. The cat, by the way, is Danté, a California Spangle cat. He loves boxes.

Edit: Part 3 is now live.

Lately I’ve been using the 360 more than usual. I discovered the 1v100 beta, which my wife and I play together, and I’ve been replaying the Penny Arcade games, both of which are amazingly well written and very funny. I even signed up for the preview of the new update (which went live to everyone the other day) and decked out my avatar with a steam punk outfit and an RC Warthog.

This evening, I decided I’d play some more of the first Penny Arcade game, ‘On the Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness – Episode 1′. I grabbed the controller and hit the guide button as I had so many times before, and listened for the familiar whir of the fans. When I switched my monitor to the VGA input, though, blackness greeted me.  Glancing at the console, I swore quite loudly.

>Blink< >Blink< >Blink<

Three red rings flashed before me, and I knew my console’s time was up.

First stop, xbox.com/support for a warranty check. Status? Out-of-warranty. But wait! There’s a three-year extension for red-ring issues! Following the instructions, I clicked the button to create a repair, and was prompted with a form to fill out. However, there was one small but glaring problem. Please enter a U.S. address. The country box, pre-selected with U.S.A., was grayed out. Unable to continue, I called the Xbox support number (1-800-4MY-XBOX, or 1-800-469-9269 for the text-to-number challenged).

On the phone, I was greeted with an IVR system that repeatedly instructed me to use the website for the repair. Unfortunately, voice recognition has only come so far, and my attempts to tell it to sod off were not understood. Instead, after choosing the repair options and being told to go to the website, and then not being understood when I repeatedly shouted AGENT! in to the phone, I hammered 2 and eventually got through to a person.

The agent was very nice and understanding, did not ask for repeat information, and quickly determined that the Xbox was in need of repair. After confirming my information (my email address was an old one I no longer use, and therefore needed to be updated), he created the repair order, gave me my Service Request number, and informed me I’d receive a pre-paid shipping label in my email within two-to-three hours.

So now the waiting begins. Will I have a trouble-free experience? Will everything work out in the end? Myself, I’m not so sure. You see, I spent the better (and worse) part of two-and-a-half years working for Microsoft Product Support for Windows XP, Vista, and the Zune MP3 player. I know Microsoft’s tools and processes, and I know things about their repair centres that I don’t dare post for fear of legal retribution. Suffice to say, I expect to have to go through several phone calls and quite possibly a few escalations before this gets resolved.

But things may work out. You never know.

Edit: Part 2 is now live.

What’s next? Is someone going to take Minesweeper to the next level?

“We don’t have any plans to support LAN [in Starcraft 2]…we will not support it.”

Wait, what? My first exposure to the original Starcraft was at a LAN party. Hell, that’s primarily how I’ve played it since.

Blizzard? Can you reconsider?

Update: Blizzard has posted a response to the flood of complaints regarding the lack of LAN-play. Coverage here. Summary? No good reason. My concern is that years down the road, Blizzard will shutdown Battle.Net for some reason or other, and suddenly there will be no multiplayer support for Starcraft 2 what-so-ever. Damn.

It came with a full charge, and I used it a fair bit during the month. Last night, however, it died while I was playing in the first beta session for 1v100 on Xbox Live. I plugged in the cable and forgot about it.

Fast-forward to this evening.

I decided I’d check out the new trailer for Halo 3: ODST via the Xbox Live Marketplace, so I unplugged the Play & Charge USB cable, hit the Centre Button on the controller (the ‘light-up X’ in the middle) and waited. And waited more. I hit the button a few more times, then just turned on the console via the button on the front. After it started, I tried the controller again. Still nothing.

After plugging the USB cable in again, I noticed the red ‘charge’ light come on. The controller was immediately detected by the console, and all was well. On a whim, I checked the battery level. Dead. However, the red charge light was gone and replaced with the happy green ‘fully charged’ light. Not good. Time to troubleshoot!

• Tried the original battery pack with some fresh AA’s – Worked
• Tried the Play & Charge battery with another controller – No Go
• Tried a different Play & Charge cable with the batter – No Go
• Tried cable with both the console and my PC (front and read USB ports on both) – No Go

Well, process of elimination dictates it must be the battery. Firing up http://xbox.com/support (and waiting five-bloody-minutes for the site to load – hopefully it’s just a temporary issue), I found the phone number (1-800-4MY-XBOX) and called support. After working my way through the voice menu system, I got an agent.

I quickly provided my name, then explained the issue and exactly what I did to troubleshoot. After confirming my serial number and address, he agreed the problem was the battery and promply filled out the form to send me a replacement. I thanked him, got my Service Request (ticket number, reference number, whatever you want to call it), and disconnected. Total call time: 12 minutes. That’s definately something to be impressed with, as I used to work for Zune customer support, and we used the same tools which constantly crashed.

Now to sit back and wait the 2-4 four weeks for the replacement battery to get here.

To solve the problem, I fired up a Windows XP VM I had running on VirtualBox. After enabling 3D Acceleration, the game ran fine, and looked great in the windowed VM. We all connected to a game on Battle.net, and then things went downhill. My soon-to-be-brother-in-law Dave was playing as well, and shares my internet connection. Starcraft, apparently, doesn’t like multiple people connected to the same game from behind a single router. Much lag ensued.

To solve the problem, one of us would have to bypass the router. As my system is right beside the cable modem and primary router (and Dave connects through a Client-Bridge router), I was the obvious choice.

After digging around and finding a second NIC, I plugged it in to my system and fired it up. Also in prep, I connected a 10/100 5 port switch to my cable modem and plugged the router in to the switch. Once Windows finished booting, I configured everything as follows (these steps are for Windows XP, however this is possible in Vista and Windows 7 as well):

1. Installed the NIC Driver
2. Opened the ‘Network Connections’ Control Panel and opened the Properties dialog for the new adapter
3. Unchecked the ‘Internet Protocol TCP/IP’ option — this prevents the host operating system from obtaining an IP address on this adapter, which is a must for security, and because my ISP only allows me to use two External IP Addresses.
4. Opened Sun VirtualBox, selected my VM and chose ‘Settings’
5. In the ‘Network’ section, set the adapater to use the Bridged network, and changed the adapter to the new one.
6. Connected the new network card to the switch.
7. Booted the VM

Now the XP VM has an External IP Address, and the host operating system doesn’t.

Once done, Starcraft played beautifully!