LaslowNET

During my run at Gordita technical support, I had more than a few calls regarding laptop batteries. This one really took the cake, however, and even has a surprise twist ending!

Me: Thank you for calling Gordita technical support, this is Laslow. How can I help you today?

Her: Well, the battery in my laptop doesn’t charge, and as soon as I unplug the power it turns off. I need you to send me a replacement battery.

Me: Okay, I just need to verify a few account details….

After gathering all of the need information from her, I pulled up the warranty information on the account – although the laptop had a three year warranty extension on it, it was a month out of warranty. To make matters worse, batteries were only covered during the original warranty period and not at all under extended warranties.

Me: Well, ma’am, unfortunately your laptop is no longer under warranty, and the battery itself is only covered by the original warranty. The extended warranty you purchased explicitly states it’s not covered.

Her: But it’s been like that since I bought it!

Now, if there’s one thing I hate, it’s when people use the line “it’s been like that since I bought it“. Sometimes it’s legitimate, and they return it right away, or even a few days/weeks later if they’re busy. But when people try it months or even years after the fact, it’s usually pretty obvious that they’re just trying to get something for free. I hated it when I worked retail, I hated it when I worked in call centres, and I still hate it now, even to the point where I called someone out about it in line at a local London Drugs store.

Me: I’m sorry ma’am, but at this point I can’t do anything about it. If it did it when you got it, why didn’t you return it to the store, or call us right away? I mean, the battery is now three years out-of-warranty.

Her: Well, the laptop has been in my closet for a few years. I traveled for a while and never really thought about it.

Me: But if it’s done it since you got it, you had to have used it to know about that, right? Why didn’t you take care of it right away?

Her: I just didn’t have time. Now, if you won’t do something about this, transfer me to someone who will!

Those, folks, are the magic words that were my ticket out of an annoying call. As soon as she said them, I prompted ask to put her on hold while I got Customer Relations on the line. She agreed, and three minutes later I had an agent connect.

Now, at Gordita, Customer Relations was handled overseas. I really felt bad for these guys, because the only customers that ever got to them were usually pissed off, obnoxious, or just plain annoying. No matter how much they got paid, it wasn’t enough, as they only dealt with the bottom-of-the-barrel. Regardless, I was very happy they were there.

CR Agent: Customer Relations, this is Mary.

Me: Hi, Mary, this is Laslow from Level 1 support. I’ve got a customer on the line who is OOW [out of warranty] and wants us to replace her battery because “it’s been like that since she bought it”.

Mary: Is she just out of her standard warranty?

Me: Nope, she’s a month out of her three year extended warranty.

Mary: Okay, I’ll set her straight – put her through.

I couldn’t have been happier – a no-nonsense CR Agent willing to take the call immediately. Were it possible, I probably would have kissed her right then.

However, as I went to bring the customer in to the call, instead of hitting the Conference button, I accidentally hit the Disconnect button immediately below it. Shit.

Thinking fast, I got the customer back on the line.

Me: Sorry for the delay, ma’am – there’s a bit of a wait in the queue, so it’s taking longer than expected. Do you mind waiting a few more minutes?

Her: That’s fine.

So, back to the Customer Relations queue I went, and was connected to a different agent almost immediately.

CR Agent: Thank you for calling Customer Relations, this is Jen.

Me: Hi, Jen. I was actually just speaking with Mary over there. <snip the re-explanation of the problem>

Jen: Oh, so the customer wants a new battery, and she’s just out of her extended warranty?

Me: That’s correct. Should I put her though?

Jen (to the sound of furious typing in the background): No, that’s alright – I’m just adding an exception to the case authorizing the OOW replacement of the battery. Is there anything else I can do for you?

Refreshing my screen, I verified that yes, Jen had in fact authorized me to send the customer a replacement battery. I slowly thanked her, then went back to the customer.

Me: Ma’am, I have to say that you must be made out of a leprechauns, because Customer Relations authorized me to send you a replacement battery.

Her: Well, Laslow, I knew you could do it! I’m not happy that I had to wait so long, but I’m glad to see your superiors corrected you.

Me (grumbling): Yes, well, in order to process this, I need to go through the order process and inform you of what you need to do….

After reminding her that she would need to send us back the old battery and filling out the order form, I thanked her again and disconnect. Then, to the amusement of the people sitting around me, plowed my head in to my keyboard a few times.

I don’t remember ever getting Jen again on future calls to Customer Relations, but this whole incident just goes to show that it doesn’t hurt to try – the worst that can happen is they say ‘No’, and even if it goes against the odds, you might end up with what you want.